What Wall Are You Hiding Behind?

Over the years, we collect filters through which we process life. These filters determine how we respond to everyday life… both the little stuff and the really huge stuff. These filters determine how we relate to people… how we make decisions… how we think. The things we let influence us and speak into our lives make up these filters. These filters will quickly build walls in our lives.

Here are some common walls that we build around our life which are usually the opposite of what God's Word teaches.

1. A Wall of FEAR

• Do I fail to realize that God is in control?
• Do I want God to be in control of my life?
• Am I afraid of what God might ask of me?

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:6–7

2. A Wall of DIRT

• Have the things that I once considered filth become the source of my entertainment?
• Does what once made me blush now make me laugh?

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Phil. 4:8

3. A Wall of ACTIVITY

• Has church activity become a substitute for an intimate relationship with Jesus?
• Have I filled my life with endless, meaningless activities?
• Am I trying to earn God's love?

Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you. Phil. 4:9

4. A Wall of COMPLAINING

• Do I think God has given me the short end of the stick?
• Do I compare myself to others?

How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. Phil. 4:10–12

5. The Wall of DEFEAT

• Do I believe the Bible is God's Word?
• Am I willing to trust His promises?

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Phil. 4:13

So the real question is this: Are you ready to tear down some walls in your life?

Grandmother

I was thinking of my Grandmother today. Just a few weeks after her 102nd birthday (which was February 28, 2011) she went home to be with the Lord. She was ready for death... and most importantly she was ready for heaven. Always thinking ahead, Grandmother had planned out her funeral. She made all of the arrangements. She planned for me to conduct her memorial service. I didn't know about this until my uncle told me after she passed away. It was an honor for me. The picture above was taken on her 102nd birthday. My last visit with her was just a few days prior. Grandmother Brock was my last grandparent and I will miss her.

Teddy Roosevelt was President when Grandmother Brock was born. Only 8% of all the homes in America had a telephone. There were 46 states and 8,000 registered cars in the entire United States. Gas was 6 cents per gallon. She was born 6 years after the Wright Brothers’ flight at Kitty Hawk; 2 years after the Model T Ford was produced; and 1 year before the Boy Scouts began. She was 18 when Charles Lindbergh made his historic non-stop flight over the Atlantic Ocean and 20 years old when the Stock Market crashed and began the Great Depression.

When she was born, marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all sold over the counter at the local drugstore. No wonder they called it the “good ‘ole days!”

My family lives long. I grew up with most of my great-grandparents. My last great-grandparent died when I was in my twenties. It was Grandmother Brock's mother. I was 32 years old when my first grandparent passed away.

Each time we visited Grandmother Brock with my kids, we would always leave laughing. She was feisty and funny. Her memory was amazing. She lived in the same house for over 70 years. She could tell you how much she paid for it; who painted it the very first time; how much the paint cost… on and on.

One time when she was in her early nineties, she found a man going through her bedroom. She confronted him and told him to get out. She gave him $20 and said “that’s all I have, so take it and get out.” (She actually had a great deal of money…). The intruder told her, “I can’t take your last $20.” She said, “I want you to take it and get out of my house!” The next day, I called her and asked if she was okay. She said yes. “Were you scared?” I will never forget her reply. “No, I wasn’t scared. I was mad!” Then she really got my attention when she said “But I’m ready if he comes back.” “What do you mean grandmother?” Then she really, really got my attention. “I’ve got a shooter!!” I wanted to clarify what I had just heard, “You mean you have a gun?” “I sure do. And I am ready!” Wow! How would you like to face a pistol packing 90 year old grandmother? Of course it would have taken her ten minutes to pull the trigger.

Well, I immediately called my Uncle Gary who took care of Grandmother. “Gary, you need to get over to Grandmother’s house. She has a gun and she is ready to use it!” He laughed… “I’ve already taken care of it.”

Grandmother loved her Lord and loved her church. She was faithful to both. However, Grandmother Brock did have one serious vice. She loved TV wrestling. She would tell me, "Donald, I know its not real, but it sure is fun to watch." When Meredith met Grandmother Brock for the first time, she told Meredith, "You should think about becoming a TV wrestler..." We laughed for a long time.

Grandmother lived by herself in her home until she was 100 years old at which time she finally moved into a nursing home… but she never lost her humor or her feistiness. On one of my last visits to her I said, “Grandmother, its Donald.” She looked me straight into my eyes and got mad, “I know who you are!” Then just to prove the point she asked, “How is Mary, Katie, Mack and Meredith?” Boy, she quickly put me in my place. I'm surprised she didn't ask me about the dog.

I will miss talking to Grandmother about my Dad… her first born. The only time I ever saw my her cry was the night Dad died. She told me many times, “Mack was your Grandfather’s very best friend. They were more like brothers than father and son. Mack always took care of us.”

Thanks Grandmother for finishing well! I will see you one day soon.

Passive Parenting

The following is from a blog that I follow by James Emery White. I find that his writings are usually right on target. This is one that all parents need to read...

The average child between the age of 8-18 “now spends practically every waking minute – except for the time in school – using a smart phone, computer, television or other electronic device” according to a study that didn’t receive the wide discussion it deserved when released in 2010 by the Kaiser Family Foundation.

Specifically, they spend more than seven and a half hours a day with such devices. And that doesn’t count the 1.5 hours spent texting, or the half-hour they talk on their cell phones.

And because they multi-task (for example, surfing the net while listening to their iPod), they manage cramming nearly 11 hours of media content into that seven and a half hours.

The study also found that heavy media use is associated with behavior problems, poor grades and obesity. According to the study, the “heaviest media users were also more likely to report that they were bored or sad, or that they got into trouble, did not get along well with their parents and were not happy at school.”

Despite the alarming amount of time being spent with media, and the negatives associated with its heavy use, Dr. Michael Rich (a pediatrician at Children’s Hospital Boston who directs the Center on Media and Child Health) said that it was time to stop arguing over whether it was good or bad and accept it as part of children’s environment.

I’m sorry. Excuse me?

Thank goodness for the simple sanity of Victoria Rideout, a Kaiser vice president and lead author of the study, who said that although it has become harder for parents to control what their children do, they can still have an effect.

“They can still make rules and it still makes a difference.”

Precisely.

An increasing number of parents today seem to throw up their hands in defeat in the face of their cultural surroundings as if they are powerless to do anything about their child’s friends, education and use of media.

Let’s call it what it is: passive parenting.

A passive parent is someone who sees what needs to be addressed, sees what needs to be attended, and doesn’t attend to it. “Giving in” and “going along” becomes paramount to their thinking.

“You’re wearing that? Well, I guess everyone is.”

“You want to watch what? Well, if everyone is.”

“You want to do what? Well, if the others are.”

In truth, they are abdicating their role. They are not doing what they are called to do as a parent. The assumption with parenting is simple: your children are immature and need your maturity. Yet some parents are more eager to be liked, or accepted by their kids, than they are to be parents to their kids.

So instead of being active, they’re passive.

Let me state what I hope is obvious: seven and a half hours a day with media is wrong. No parent should allow it. Force them (yes, I said “force”) to read, to use their imagination, to get outside and play with a dog or participate in a sport.

I know, that means becoming an active parent.

But unless I’m mistaken, that’s what parenting is about.

James Emery White


Sources

Tamar Lewin, “Children Awake? Then They’re Probably Online,” The New York Times, Wednesday, January 20, 2010, p. A1 and A3. Greg Toppo, “Kids’ digital day: Almost 8 hours,” USA Today, Wednesday, January 20, 2010, p. 1A.

Matt Richtel, “Growing Up Digital, Wired for Distraction,” The New York Times, Sunday, November 21, 2010, p. A1 and A20.

Editor’s Note

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Meet Tagg Wolverton, our Sr. Youth Pastor & family!

Tagg & Susan; Graeme (10 years old, 5th grade); Olivia (8 years old, 3rd grade); Anna (12 years old, 7th grade); Ben (14 years old, 8th grade).

God has shown tremendous favor to Gateway by sending us Tagg Wolverton as our next Senior Youth Pastor. For the past several months your search team has diligently prayed and sought God’s man for GBC. God’s Spirit made us of one mind, heart and spirit. It was a blessing to me to work with this team: Linda Gee, Kris Corley, Renee Goodman, Larry Wagner, Joel Baker, Nick Stoia, Jeff Douglas and Ronald Flynn.

Tagg and his family will be with us this Sunday and then will begin his new position the week of February 21st. Here are a few facts about Tagg:

Ministry Experience
• Most recently served with Greater Europe Missions in the Netherlands. He was the Youth Ministry Team Leader and directed the Youth Ministry Development.
• Served 11 years at Brookwood Church in Greenville, SC as the Minister to Students. His responsibilities included middle school through college students. The ministry grew from 11 students to over 450 students.
• Served as the Worship Leader and Associate Pastor of Springbrook Baptist Church, Anderson SC.
• Served as the College Minister at First Baptist Church, Arlington, TX.
• Since 2004 has served as a mentor for Purpose Driven Youth Ministry.
• Served on the Programming Staff for Centrifuge Summer Camps.

Education
• Is in the process of finishing his PhD from the Vrije Universiteit, Amsterdam, Netherlands.
• Has both a Masters of Theology and a Research Masters in Theology from Vrije Universiteit.
• Has a Masters of Divinity with Biblical Languages from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, Ft. Worth, TX
• Has a Bachelor of Science from Auburn University, Auburn, AL

Tagg’s interest includes music, fly fishing, reading and snow skiing.

I want to say a big thanks to Dr. David Olshine of CIU for serving as our interim director for our student ministry and as a consultant for our search team.

I also want to give a HUGE – WE ARE INCREDABLY PROUD OF YOU to Amanda Brown, our female youth director. She has been amazing during the interim period. We love you Amanda… you have a special place in our heart! Our students love you!!

Send Tagg and his family a big Gateway welcome email to info@taggwolverton.com